we go forward... no other way to go really

: neke16; November 28th, 12:43

i draw the line at being a complete ass to people you call your real friends.

: neke16; November 26th, 0:49

who knew ate would be right? i for one didnt think so :)
just happy to be where i am right now, for real.
and thanks for having the coolest, most understanding friends ever
(pero you guys are amusingly annoying sometimes hahaha but its all good).

----------------------------------------
a friend told me to watch the crawl video cause i was missing out by not having seen it. totally no regrets for seeing that video. CB... i heart you. i thought i was gonna die of kilig after seeing that video. eeep :">

Crawl
by Chris Brown

Everybody see's it's you
I'm the one that lost the view
Everybody says we're through
I hope you haven't said it too

So where
Do we go from here
With all this fear in our eyes
And where
Can love take us now
We've been so far down
We can still touch the sky

If we crawl
Till we can walk again
Then we'll run
Until we're strong enough to jump
Then we'll fly
Until there is no end
So lets crawl, crawl, crawl
Back to love, Yeah
Back to love, Yeah

Why did I change the pace
Hearts were never meant to race
I always felt the need for space
But now I can't reach your face
So where
Are you standing now
Are you in the crowd of my faults
Love, can you see my hand?
I need one more chance
We can still have it all

If we crawl(if we crawl)
Till we can walk again
Then we'll run (then we'll run)
Until we're strong enough to jump
Then we'll fly
Until there is no end
So lets crawl, crawl, crawl
Back to love, Yeah
Back to love, yeaaah

Everybody see's it's you
Well I never wanna lose that view

So we'll crawl (if we crawl)
Till we can walk again
Then we'll run
Until we're strong enough to jump
Then we'll fly
Until there is no end
So lets crawl, crawl, crawl

So we'll crawl (ooh)
Till we can walk again (till we can walk again)
Then we'll run (we'll run)
Until we're strong enough to jump (until we're strong enough to jump)
Then we'll fly (then we'll fly)
Until there is no end
So let's crawl, let's crawl, lets crawl
Back to love
Back to love yeah
Back to love

<3

i miss lola ner

: neke16; November 23rd, 0:35

ner siazon: eh kung kumakagat naman sila kasalanan mo pa ba hahahhahahahahahah

I MISS YOU NE!

pagpapanggap

: neke16; November 15th, 23:15

and who the hell are you hiding from?

alcohol hiatus

: neke16; November 15th, 2:09

until the end of fourth long exams...

if possible :)

hehe.. kaya i havent been getting well e :))

somethings you just dont get used to

: neke16; November 15th, 0:58

i have come to realize my tolerance for crap.
i have also realized that some people will never truly understand.
theyre just to wrapped up in their own worlds to see whats really happening.

WTH?

i want perpetual good vibes.
ive been sad/bad/tired vibes lately. how pathetic is that.
and i know its mostly hormonal.
eff it.

i got hit big time by pms this time around.

here to hoping for a turn around! ;)

secrets

: neke16; November 10th, 13:21

sometimes, i honestly believe that secrets should be kept secret.

and its not fun when its other people divulging your thoughts, your revelations, your everything and anything to be honest.

what has happened to the world today that one secret cant be kept?

secrets were not made to be spilled.
thats a fact.
secrets make friendships stronger.
secrets make things more sacred.

secrets... keep a little mystery going in our lives.
who ever said the world had to know everything?

i wish...

: neke16; November 9th, 19:57

i miss the days that i'd feel inspired.
so inspired to write about something so bad that it couldnt wait.
so inspired that i didnt care if my grammar was wrong, or that it was even in taglish.
so inspired that i was too excited to put it down on paper.
so inspired that i would feel satisfaction for the end product and not feel like i wrote a cop out.

it isnt supposed to be forced...
but lately, i feel like my life has been uninspired... or rather, dull.

dull in a sense that, its on the OK.
i know this was what i wanted for a long time but at the same time, you kind of miss the sense of inspiration that is SO STRONG that it overwhelms you... whether it be good or bad, positive or negative.

sometimes i feel that to be in the extremes of a spectrum is so much better than being stuck constantly in the middle.
the middle isnt always fun.

rain down some inspiration on me please... any kind.

i feel sad that i have nothing that compels me to write here so much anymore... :(

theres something new every time

: neke16; November 8th, 5:42

its getting tiring or whatever.
just take it as it is, i guess.

strangely enough, some things still surprise me. maybe because i choose to ignore a LOT.
augh.
i hate this.
why why why did everything suddenly make sense?

stupid people.
but seriously though, this is NOT on me.
thats a FACT.

and i will take comfort in the fact that liability will not fall on me. it will NOT.
di ako papayag.

pesteng buhay to.

someday we'll know

: neke16; October 28th, 15:07

you know... dont ever use that card on me.

it isnt funny and it isnt fair.

i never ask for special treatment.
i work hard (harder than i ever have).
and i try not to impose (kapal ko naman to do so just because of my last name).

ive never done that and never will.

dont make the mistake of thinking that you've got me all figured out.
im NOT that person. dont forget that.

massive love :)

: neke16; October 25th, 18:27

so today ends my EXTREMELY short lived sembreak of 4 school days and the weekend.
wow. it went by too fast but obviously, i have no regrets :)

one of the most PACKED sembreaks i've had. and though it kind of sucks to not have TOO much rest, atleast i wont feel like as if my brain has atrophied to the point that i have to start learning how to study AGAIN. i guess thats the only thing i am grateful for.

monday, even before my last final... i already had a spa date with ate and some drinks and wii with my friends who got exempted from the HLC final. boo you guys:)) just kidding. like as if i was going to study again for that final. WHUT.

tuesday, i had lunch with aika and ren in MOA and then had ice skating catastrophic fun with blockmates. i cant remember laughing so hard at so many things at the same time :)) oh and its pretty cool to have a former philippine team figure skater as a blockmate. i could just watch him the whooooole time. good job coach kim! :p after which was daquiri night as requested by renamar in mezza :) chill drinking til 2 am.

then we spent an hour arguing about the supposed backpacking trip to sta rosa. slept at 3 am and woke up at 6 to ren taking sleeping pictures of us. WAH embarrassing!!! and then we got ready for our adventure! since people decided to come along, the trip pushed through minus the backpacking! yey! :D

we arrived at sta rosa (everything c/o deni) at 11am. we swam as if there was no tomorrow :)) after which half went back home and half stayed for an inuman that turned into a somewhat sleepover :) guess which half i was with? :)) it was cuervo and bacardi night, i LOVED IT :D i fell asleep from exhaustion at around 2 and woke up at 6 to christian's hyena like laughter all the way from down stairs!

then it was time for breakfast and the trip back home to UE :D the night (thursday) was followed by major catching up session with the numerz! 7/9 is the best number we've had in years!

friday, i thought i'd be too tired but i ended up shopping with tita kit in festival :p i wish i were rich. haha. and finally saturday was franz' bday celebration. though i didnt get to drink, because my dad BANNED me from drinking... i still had fun. it was pretty funny last night, really :)

today, sunday is all family day. chill at home... kasi bukas may pasok na ulit.
where did my sembreak go again? i havent even enrolled yet! HAHAHAHA.

well thats that for now :) time for me to go back to sulking about medschool.
atleast one thing is for sure, i now officially have massive love for my friends in UE :)
my sembreak was fun. seriously :D
heres to 4 more years together. HAHAHA :)

my brain is finally awake

: neke16; October 9th, 3:47

ive been distracting myself the whole day since im tired from studying.
too much distractions, i must say.
how could i not ignore the craziness i feel after ateneo went back to back?! :D its crazy. i love it!

not to mention, today was the first time i drank since that tequila night we had a couple of weeks back.
god i miss drinking.
the happy tambay chill drinking. its pure love.
i havent really had that in med. not YET. today just reminded me of that :)
chili's frozen margaritas are the BEST ;) heeheehee

i just wanted to post since i havent been writing so much anymore (plus the fact that its another distraction hehe). atleast now i know my brain is functioning enough to understand all the physio i plan to finish before i go to class in a few hours :)

new addiction: GLEE <3 im HOOKED.

"kilig" moment for the day: c/o GG (haha)

"when you forget that your blaire waldorf. remember IM CHUCK BASS AND I LOVE YOU."

eeeeeeeeep :">

hahaha omg this post is so uselesssssssssss.
must be the coffee coursing through my veins :))
back to studying like NOW.

withdrawal... not

: neke16; October 3rd, 14:59

this coming tuesday will mark...
1 month since i've touched a cigarette :o

lets hope this lasts ;)
heehee
----
i want to go back to school because i feel like a sloth in this house :| :( so unproductive.
even if medschool is hard, it keeps my brain busy.
here in the house, all i do is eat and sleep. SERIOUSLY!

rain rain go away so i cant go back to the dorm!

scared in a room full of people

: neke16; September 27th, 10:48

well not full of people (we were only 6) and the room wasnt exactly big to begin with.

ate, reg, nikki reyes, sol, tina and i were stranded in the dorm from yesterday afternoon til early this morning. it got worse late in the afternoon when the flood waters entered the first floor. we had no water in the pipes and no electricity :( not to mention, internet was down and all our batteries in our phones were already about to die.

it was kind of scary as we could still see the waters by the river rising and rising, and the walls surrounding it disappearing. MAY ALON. the dorm, UERM, and all the rest of the buildings looked like tiny islands surrounded by a BROWN ocean. thank god ate was there, or else i wouldnt be able to contact my parents.

we were all literally just stuck.
my dad was less than 5 minutes away from us, and he couldnt even come close.
text messages that were delayed by minutes to hours were our only means of communication.
i had friends stuck in various areas and i was freaking out also for them :( they were all hungry and tired and currently stranded in the histo lab, ana amphi, and jmc bldg.

never in my whole life did i ever think i'd experience something like that. although i didnt starve, or anything... i was scared. so so scared. my family was scattered. we couldnt fully contact each other. i had friends who couldnt leave where they were stranded... it was all surreal.

and the saddest moment i think that i felt all that time was when the boys dormitory of medics got flooded (first floor kasi sila) and they were relocated to our floor but all of them were stuck in one room. we heard them still awake past midnight so sol, tina and ate checked how they were. di pa daw sila nakakakain, and they needed something to lie down on at the very least. sol and tina gave them an extra mattress. we gave them a comforter and 2 bags of chips. when ate gave them the small bag of piattos (cause we really didnt have much to begin with), they were so happy for food :| so who the hell was i to complain?

i just got really scared, though we laughed it all off in the dark.
you never know... never know when disaster will hit you.
no one is exempt from the rule :(

i just hope everyone is alright!
im writing this because i want people to get how bad metro manila was yesterday and even today. the videos and pictures dont do the damage justice. you had to see it happening to you to understand just how bad everything got :(

ondoy made me understand the gravity of the devastation katrina left behind in new orleans :(

heres to hoping everyone is safe and dry.

tides have changed but for the better :)

: neke16; September 22nd, 17:08

i am hoping this is for the better.

im just glad that theres progress, though minimal. its a start.

back to basics.
im glad :)

this is long overdue.
hello.

sometimes...

: neke16; September 21st, 11:52

i wish you just tried ~~harder~~.

maybe, just maybe...
things would be different.

not a good weekend: period, stress, dry eyes.... HORMONAL... freaking hormonal.

blame it on the time of the month :(

: neke16; September 19th, 19:45

perfect timing really...

its just one of those days that realizations just flood your every thought.

hate it.
and yes, i blame it on my monthly friend.

what this week has made me realize

: neke16; September 10th, 19:19

i CAN do this.
FOR REAL
:)

me likey this realization :D

lets hope history doesnt repeat itself

: neke16; September 10th, 19:12

for a moment, it scared me to realize that...
you remind me of someone i used to know.

and i DONT think thats a good sign :|

please prove me wrong.
:|

slow and steady

: neke16; September 4th, 0:11

its official.
i am going insane.

medschool is officially a bitch... but no, i dont want to quit.
its a pain on my behind simply because for some reason, i still havent gotten the hang of it.

so heres the deal, the upcoming third exam will be my best yet.
I PROMISE YOU THAT.
i will not fail anything.
i cannot fail anything.
i will not be like that person in dr. elma's story.
the 68% average by the fourth long exam. that will be the death of me,

i KNOW i can do this.
i HAVE to make this HAPPEN.

i have no back up plan... and i refuse to have to HAVE ONE just because i didnt try even harder/a different method.

heres to the new method.
nobody make fun.
im taking this seriously now. watch me. support me.
kailangan na talaga e.

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neke16

we go forward... no other way to go really

and yes, reality bites

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